Ferocious Fours - part deux

By Laura L.

Somewhere on this site there is a post about a four-year-old girl pushing her mother to try new levels of punishment. I wrote that one. It's about my oldest who is now (finally) a likable person again. Unfortunately for all of us, the 18 month difference between my girls means that the calming of the oldest marks the descent into madness for the youngest.

If you've known me long enough you may remember my relief and joy that my sweet second child was a quiet newborn, a quiet infant, and an introverted toddler. There were a few months of worry that she may never talk, but she was just a bit behind. Truthfully as much as her big sis talks we all have to find a place to fit two words in. Regardless, she is/has been different in so many ways - one would dare use "easy baby" - that I hoped this phase would follow suit. Julia turned 4 in February and it is different. She is making up for lost time.

This back-to-back fourness has worn my nerves and shredded my patience, but she is definitely worse. The tantrums are bigger and badder. I have yet to find a punishment that seems to affect her in any way other than a temporary slow down of her total annihilation of the house. Also we describe her whiney voice as the dog whistle. The pitch and shriekiness of it makes me (and the dog) mental. She's become a picky eater, has decided peeing in the toilet is optional and likes to find the tallest point in every room and jump from it.

The one positive I hang onto? Like every other part of parenting the second kid, I know it will end. The fear that I may never like to be in her company again isn't floating just beneath the surface of my "It's just a phase" mantra. It really is just a phase. I know it as opposed to hoping it. By this time next year we'll be on the other side of it. And - if she changes as much as her sister - all signs of baby will be gone and I'll have two big kids.

Still, keep a mattress-covered room on order for me, I have a feeling back-to-back fourteens will be my undoing.

What has been the most challenging age to you as a parent?

Comments

[Erin]

15 is very trying! You just wait! Teenage boys know everything! Just ask them.

[Leann]

4 has been the worst so far, but now that 5 is just appearing on the horizon, I'm seeing that things will get better again. My coworker says that when her oldest hit 4, it drove her to take a parenting class. She said it's the hardest age, so I'm liking that we're almost to age 5!