Work It: a blog for Working Moms

Martin Luther King Day - For Kids

by Amy S.

We buy a $3 large, hang-up style calendar from OfficeMax every year and hang it on the back of Olivia's door. We started last year when she was four to count days until special holidays, birthdays, etc. This year it's become even more educational, as she can now recognize the words "No School" - and she gets giggly and does the "no school" dance.

This morning she read "No School" for tomorrow's date and then proceeded to tell me, "It's Martin Luther King Day tomorrow. We should light a candle in his honor."

Just another moment in which I silently thank her incredibly wonderful preschool teachers, including the new one she has now. It made me think about how easy it can be to overlook "teachable moments." I'm not sure I would have really taken the time to explain to her at age five, who Martin Luther King, Jr., is and why he's so important. But obviously they've been doing some of it at school, so she's ready.

I found a couple of Web sites that provide age-appropriate lessons to review on Martin Luther King Day. So we'll spend some time tomorrow talking about him and at least introducing the concepts that we can build on as she gets older. And we will also light a candle in his honor.

Easy Holiday Appetizer Recipe

Here is a great recipe for any Holiday gathering. It is for an appetizer that takes only minutes to make, can be made virtually fat free, and will be gone within minutes of you making it. I always keep extra ingredients ready to go as it seems everyone always wants seconds.

Ingredients:

1. Cream Cheese (Full Fat or Non Fat version)
2. Salsa
3. Shredded Cheddar Cheese (once again, this can be the fat free version)

Instructions:

1. Take any microwavable plate or serving dish. Cover the bottom of the dish with cream cheese.
2. On top of the cream cheese layer, cover that with salsa.
3. Over the salsa, generously spread the shredded cheese.
4. Microwave this on high for 1 - 2 minutes, or until the cheese on top is melted.
5. Serve with tortilla chips or anything else that makes a good dipping tool.

And that's it! This is a favorite of mine for a couple of years...I think I might need to make this tonight...

Gifts for the Teachers and the rest of the world...

by Amy W.

I know we have discussed this before on this site.

But it is killing my wallet this year.

We have two kids in daycare. They each have two teachers, a floater teacher, as well as a cook, receptionist, director, and an owner.

Do you see the dilemma with my wallet?

Don't get me wrong, the teachers (as well as the cook, receptionist and all the employees at their daycare) are fabulous and deserve every bit of every gift they receive this year. It shows in that my four year is beginning to read, and is excited about it.

So the gift cards have been purchased, cute ornaments bought for the receptionist and owner...

But is that where we end? In previous years, we have given to the mail carrier. Come rain or lack of rain in our area, our mail is delivered. But this year, the mail carrier broke our mailbox shoving our mail in. And is a giftcard what they want? What is the appropriate amount?

And garbage collectors? I have heard before of people leaving six pack of beers or other items for them. Is that what they want?

And don't even get me started on coworkers. I had my boss tell me she purchased my gift months ago. What in the heck do I get her??

Gotta love the holidays...

A Very Important Part of Hanukkah

by Coletta

I believe that my son is the only Jewish child in his Pre-school class of 12 kids. I am anticipating that a friend or a teacher may ask him questions about the holiday...and, in preparation for this, I asked my son why we celebrate Hanukkah. Now, my son is three and rather free spirited but I was still disappointed when his answer was "for presents!" I promptly explained that Hanukkah was a celebration of the miracle of the lasting oil and that we celebrated God's power to give us light. Then I asked Morgan again. "What is the meaning of Hanukkah?"  Morgan responded, "MOM...presents are very, very, very important." 

He's right.They are. 

I spend most of the holiday season shopping, stressing about shopping or making a list of what to shop for. It doesn't help that we celebrate both Hanukkah and Christmas so Morgan will be getting gifts in some form for 2 weeks.

When I told my husband about my discussion with our son he was adamant about concentrating on one of the other big Hanukkah traditions, charity. So each night, after we light the menorah we find change to put in the tzedakah box. We also picked out a gift for the Angel tree at school. I am very happy that we are doing this. But I have a feeling that, for him to really understand charity, we, as a family, will have to do more. This holiday season I am on the lookout for opportunities for us to be generous and give not only from our wallets but also our talents and time. I honestly believe that it is better to give than to receive and the sooner my son learns this, the richer his life will be. I am also hoping to get all of my holiday shopping completed early this week so that my evenings will be free to spend time with my son, do projects, bake cookies, watch holiday specials and visit with friends, I want to show him good examples of the MOST important reasons for the season. 

The Grinch, er, obligations, ate my Christmas funds...

by Jennifer

It's happened again. Despite my careful planning -- I even waited months to submit my dependent care reimbursement forms as a way to have some holiday cash -- it looks like we're going to be really strapped this Christmas.

As I've mentioned in some previous posts, I started a new job in October. Over the summer, my husband began treatment for adult ADD. New job means new insurance... and a new deductible. That means the nearly $600 cost of the last two ADD-related visits of the year will come completely out of our pockets. What's more, I joined the ranks of the temporarily uninsured during the month of November. And, wouldn't you know it, I got very sick and needed to go to the doctor. Nearly $200 and a load of antibiotics later, I was better.

It's not as if we spend a fortune at Christmas. We're buying our son one gift... and (please understand my rationale) rewrapping three or four birthday gifts he received. We put them away to avoid new toy overload. We're spending $50 total on our two young nephews, with whom we'll be spending Christmas. We'll splurge a little for my husband's parents since they save us every time day care is closed but our offices aren't. We'll probably spend another $200 or $250 total on six more people -- my parents and younger sister and my husband's siblings. My husband and I are using American Express points to buy a joint gift for each other.

We'd be fine if that were all the gift-buying we needed to do. But, there are more people to buy for or tip: The two women who care for my son at the family day care (the pressure to figure out the right gift is weighing on me, as is the question of whether to instead follow the advice of several local New York magazines, which call for a cash gift equal to a week's day care rate); our dog walker (rule of thumb, I'm told, is a week's pay; for us, that's $50); the doormen, workmen and our building super (even though our super is useless and our doorman crew is small, if I follow the rule of thumb, I'll be handing over an envelope with at least $350); our date-night sitter (a night's pay, I'm told, but I'm thinking half-a-night's pay and a personal gift); the parking attendants at the garage we use (other garage-goers say $50 pr $60 since we only use the car on weekends). I am sure I'm forgetting several someones and many of the someones I have mentioned rely on their holiday tips as part of their income; and they deserve it... they do so much for us throughout the year. That $800 or so I never planned to spend was mostly to be divided between all of these people.

I'm not sure how I'm going to manage this. In the past, I might have turned to credit cards, but we resolved to cut them up (well, hide them) and pay them off. We've held to that for the last 11 months and I'm not inclined to break now. I'm sure I feel too much peer pressure on what and how much to give. And, I'm sure this will work itself out, just like it does almost every year.

How do you manage the holiday cash crunch? What do you do if you unexpectedly come up short?

Here comes Santa Claus, Here come Santa Claus…

by Joy

It’s that time of year again!  It’s the time of year to purge my children’s toy chest to make room for the new ones that will be coming down from Santa. My seven and four year-olds are eagerly looking forward to Christmas morning to see what great things are waiting for them under the tree.  I am trying to read the future myself and see what’s going to be under the tree for them, because I still can’t figure out what to get them for Christmas.

My oh-so-grown-up seven year old is not really into toys anymore.  Being the only female granddaughter born to a family of all grandsons, she has been inundated with pink frilly princess items since she the day she was born.  Disney princesses, Barbie, Polly Pocket, My little Pony, all these items have come and gone through the holidays, and the funny thing is that I realized a couple of years ago, she was no longer interested in these items anymore.  Oh don’t get me wrong, she lights up when she opens up her package and plays with her dolls for a little while. However, after about a month or two, her interests wanes, and it’s almost like the dolls don’t exist anymore. My son loves toys; however he is definitely the toy of the moment kind of child. Last Christmas, he was really into Star Wars. A few months ago, it was Ben 10, now (just in time for Christmas) it’s Transformers.  How much do you invest in buying a slew of toys for your 4-year-old’s passing fancy?

My husband and I are also trying to get back to the Christmas’ of our childhood when item we required for every day life were intermingled with a few new toys to play with. New toys were packaged along with new socks and clothes for the year.  Play a recreational sport? Well new gear for the sport to fit that growing body also made up the Christmas stash.  There’s of course, the whole notion of a budget.  We try very hard not to splurge at Christmas.  It’s so easy to do so, because you love your children so much, but my husband and I want to ensure that our children understand the true meaning of Christmas.  The gifts are a side-note in the grand scheme of things. So what to do? What to do?

My situation is not quite as hopeless as I make it seem though. My daughter is a budding artist in the making. Give the girl a blank piece of paper and a pen or pencil; you’ll get a pretty impressive piece of art.  So I’ve got that to work with. While my son is a toy of the moment child, he also still loves every single toy he’s ever been given. My aforementioned purge has to be done with the greatest of care so as not to tip him off.  So I have a wide range of toys to work with. As for recreational sports, both my children ice skate, and what do you know, they both need new skates. 

So I guess I should get shopping. Here's to happy success on Christmas Morning!

Does anyone else agonize over their children’s gifts like this? Or am I just nuts?

It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas

By Jessica

It is hard to believe but the holidays are right around the corner. Less than two months for Christmas and less than four weeks for Thanksgiving. 

I've been discussing Christmas with Thing 2. He has been informed that for every toy he puts on his list for Santa, he has to donate a existing toy, of equal size or bigger, to Goodwill. He is totally on board with this idea, for now. I am quite sure it will be met with many cries of anguish, or tears of frustration, when the time arrives to actually give them up. 

For me it is simple. The child has too many toys to play with as it is. Most of them he has outgrown and they need to be replaced with a more age appropriate toy.  I can not see bringing one more thing into our home until the mound of existing toys is diminished by at least half. It already looks like Santa's workshop has exploded in our house.

Thing 1 is not much easier. Since he is 12, he goes for the more high end items, iPods, a digital camera, games for the PS2 that cost a small fortune, clothes from stores that I would not step foot in unless they were giving them away, etc. He was told to make a list and hope for the best. Santa's money tree got lost in the last big storm so funding is low.

So, what are your plans on gifts for the kids for the holiday?  Do you have a set amount you are willing to spend? How soon do you start buying? Do you require your children to weed out their existing toys prior to Christmas?

When did I get old(er)?

by Amy

Sunday was the first day of fall. Wait. Wasn't it just July? I am not ready for pumpkins and gourds but even here in Virginia, where humid weather reigns, the weather has turned and fall is in the air. In another blink it will be Halloween. Thanksgiving. Then Christmas.

I remember being a child and hearing adults talk about time flying by - and thinking about how it dragged by for me. Christmas never came, my birthday took forever to come each year. As a teenager, it was all about making it to 18 alive in order to escape to college. Then it was making it to 21 to make a complete drunken fool of myself. A year later it was about graduating and starting out on my own. But by the time I had a child - at 30 - things started to speed up.

And parenthood is the spin-cycle of life. When did I become this person who now has three different skin creams to prevent, repair and smooth wrinkles? I used to carry an overnight bag for a weekend getaway - now my makeup/hair/skin/medicine bag is practically an overnight bag in itself. I used to get so annoyed with my mother when she would begin packing a suitcase up to a week in advance before a trip. Guess who's in a panic if she's not beginning to pack for a trip at least a couple of days ahead of time?

When did I get old-er? Let's be real - 34 is not old. It's not even close to being old. But it's older - and it feels like a foreign number to me. I think time froze for me at age 27 - aren't I still 27?

There are a lot of things I like about the 30s. Like knowing more about who I am all the while discovering new things about myself. There's a peace in my thirties that never came in my twenties. The first half of my twenties was about finding myself and moving past the "talk" of being independent and actually doing it. The second half of my twenties was about working really hard - building a career, finishing a Masters degree, and finding a wonderful husband. I get tired now just thinking about how hard I was constantly working then between work and school.

The first half of my thirties has been about building a family, of course. And about understanding the world through the eyes of my child. It's been about balance, always balance. But it brings with it other, less pleasant things: the sags here and there, the realization that tanning really does cause skin damage. And why am I tired all the time? I blame my thirties. But the only major complaint I have so far is just how fast it is all going. It isn't fair that life goes by more quickly the older you get. Shouldn't it be the opposite?

My mom put up one of her three or so Christmas trees back in July. She said she "had a lot of things coming up in November and wanted to get ahead of the rush." The older I get the more I can relate to that feeling. And when I'm 70-something, I'll probably decorate for Christmas in July, too. (Sorry, honey!)

Spring break woes

by Cindy

Spring Break elementary-school-style is upon us. I remember my elementary spring breaks being filled with riding bikes, making forts, and playing games of unknown origins with chalk, balls, rocks, and the occasional lime green jump rope that could make perfect whelps across your legs, if one wasn't careful.

Now, I have to break out one of my plethora of planners, (see update on Cindy's lack of organizational skills), and figure out which play date, craft involving glue, beads, and/or pipe cleaners, or what place of human interest my lovely daughters must attend today. Every waking second must be jam packed with educational, crafty, yet not too adult-like activities to stimulate their sponge like minds.

Nick junior? Not today my friends. PBS, possibly, but only for the 15 regulatory minutes, and only if the program is bilingual, introduces five new mathematical equations and oh yes, teaches some altruistic value.

Seriously, (borrowed from Grays Anatomy), my McSpringy kids need to do one thing this spring break,  and that is to slow down, draw with some chalk, or in my 2-year-old's case, taste the chalk, (don't worry, it's completely non toxic, and I think may even be a mineral) and be kids.

Happy Spring Break to all, and stay tuned for Moms Gone Wild, after elementary school breaks end! 

Cindy Brady is a new contributing writer. Welcome Cindy!

The Valentine's Day panic

By Amy S.

Any other wives out there get a little panicked when Valentine's Day gets close? It was easier pre-child - we'd actually do something for the big day. Go to dinner, see a movie, shop at Target - you know, the "big three" of romance. But now it's "The thought that counts" and all that. We don't aim to spend much, just to say "I love you and I've bought you something that reminds me of you."

Sure. Easier said than done.

So I decided to look around online and see what was out there that might fit the bill. I am not sure I'd call these real recommendations, but they looked like legitimately cool things a husband might like:

Digital Photo Keychain ($27.99, Target - other types sold elsewhere) - A great idea for the husband  who also doubles as a Dad. He gets to add a few lovely photos of you and the kiddos. And he can change the photos anytime.

24 DVD Board Game ( lists for $24.99, amazon.com has it for $20) - This was an easy pick for me, as my husband now watches the series religiously. The game doesn't require that you actually watch the show, which is a plus since I don't. It just requires you to "identify and stop a national security threat," which let's face it, would be a piece of cake comparing to getting a toddler dressed and to school on time. So I'm in! (Follow-up: Upon reading the reviews at amazon.com, this may not be quite the good-time-in-a-box it's cracked up to be. But there's a less expensive 24 game that might be worth a try.)

PowerStation Cable Organizer - (lists for $20, sold several places) - I am cheating here, as I bought this for my husband for Christmas. It's a "docking station" basically that organizes all the junk you have to plug in and recharge on a regular basis. Between the iPod, cell phone, Palm and whatever else my husband has to plug in, the PowerStation has been a favorite gift. He plugged it in Christmas Day and set it on his desk - a sure sign that he likes it.

Fog-Free Shower Mirror ($39.99, Linens 'n Things - other types sold elsewhere) - What a nifty idea for the multi-tasking husband who prefers to shave in the shower. Then again, ask yourself if you really want a mirror in the shower.

Romantic Fortune Cookies ($28, Red Envelope) - I'm a fan of Red Envelope and love their jewelry options. But since this isn't about a gift for me, they also have some great ideas for men. The Romantic Fortune Cookies are cute and romantic, but not horribly cheesy and do not require anyone dressing up in a nightie. (Although that's always optional!)

Do you actually leave the house for Valentine's Day? (We are SO jealous.) What are some of your husband's favorite V-Day gifts?